Does My Cat Love Me? Here's How To Tell

Updated Jun. 13, 2024
woman leaning on a kitchen table and looking at her orange tabby cat, which is standing on the table

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It’s a common misconception that our feline friends are not affectionate creatures. Yes, it’s true that earning the love of a cat is not always easy, but when a cat begins to show trust and adoration for you, there’s often no better feeling of accomplishment.

Do Cats Love Their Pet Parents?

Yes, cats are social and affectionate animals that can grow to love their pet parents.

Their furry counterparts, dogs, are much more open with their love through licking, wagging their tail, constant attention, and obvious “come play with me” body language.

Cats are much more subtle in showing their love, though that does not mean that the shared bond between cats and humans is any less than with dogs. It just means that you’ll need to work harder to understand your cat’s love language and boundaries to build trust.

12 Signs Your Cat Loves You

So, how do cats show affection? Their body language, behaviors, and vocalizations often tell us a lot about their level of trust and adoration. Acknowledging and understanding these behaviors can help build a strong, loving bond with your cat.

Here are some common signs that your cat loves you:

1. Slow Blinking

Eyes are said to be the windows to the soul, and cats use eye contact with their people to show adoration. Often, cats directly stare into the eyes of those that they trust and love.

Cats will often make eye contact with lowered eyelids and steady, slow blinks. This is considered a feline version of a kiss, and you can even try slow blinking to show love back to cats.

2. Headbutting

Your cat may bump their head against you or rub their cheeks against you to show affection. This is a social behavior formed in kittenhood through headbutting other kittens and their mother.

Headbutting is often an attempt to mark you with their scent to claim you as one of their own. It helps cats bond and is offered to their humans to show love.

3. Grooming

Cats groom each other as a display of affection, and this behavior will extend to humans when trust is built. Cats will often lick their people or allow them to brush them. Licking is similar to the grooming cats perform on their feline friends, allowing them to mark each other and build their bond.

But watch for fast tail swishing and listen for any growling or hissing, because grooming—especially with brushing—can be overstimulating if it’s forceful or goes on for too long.

4. Kneading

Cats usually knead with their front paws. This is a behavior that begins in kittenhood and is associated with nursing on their mother. Kneading is believed to bring comfort by releasing endorphins to reduce stress and promote relaxation.

Relaxed cats that knead are showing contentment. They will often knead when you gently pet or stroke them. Sometimes cats knead to create a softer sleeping spot, which is considered an innate behavior.

5. Showing Their Belly

This is often considered the ultimate sign of trust for a cat. Cats only lie on their backs and show their bellies when they are in their most relaxed state.

But this is not an invitation to pet or rub your cat’s belly! They are simply communicating that they feel comfortable and safe enough to reveal one of the most vulnerable parts of their body. If you go in for the belly rub, be careful, as your cat might retaliate with a bite or scratch.

6. Meowing

Cats will often give us short, quiet meows when we speak slowly and softly to them. If the meows get longer and drawn out or turn to hisses, this may be a sign that your kitty has had enough interaction.

7. Purring

Cats often purr to show contentment when they are resting near you or when you’re petting them. They may also purr when they’re nervous, but this is often paired with different body language such as holding their ears back, putting their head down, fast tail-swishing, or hiding.

8. Greeting You at the Door

Your cat is trying to show you that they missed you when they greet you at the door. This is often followed by walking in-between your legs and curling their tail around your legs. Sometimes it’s also accompanied by meowing and “rattle-tail” behavior, where your cat will shake their tail quickly.

This is your cat’s way of welcoming you home. They may also be telling you something more important, like they’re ready to eat, they need fresh water, or their litter box needs to be cleaned, so be sure to check these things.

9. Following You

Cats often follow those they love and trust around the home. It is similar to the greeting at your front door, where they follow behind you and keep you in sight at all times. They may also weave around your legs.

10. Tail Language

Cats often use their tails to express adoration for their pet parents. A content cat will often hold their tail in an upright position with a C-shape or hook at the very top.

They may slowly wag their tail back and forth and allow it to touch you when they are lying next to you. Sometimes, cats will even rattle their tail while walking when they are very happy to see you. But watch closely if your cat is shaking and rattling their tail in front of a vertical surface, because this can also be a sign of urine marking.

11. Bringing You Presents

Cats are hunters at heart, and sometimes a cat that catches a mouse or insect will bring the remains back to their humans as a gift. Though this may turn your stomach, it truly is a sign of love and pride. Your cat wants to reward you for your love.

Cats will also do this with toys if they don’t have the option to hunt live prey.

12. Sleeping Near You

A cat who chooses to sleep on or close to you is showing their love and trust in you. Even if they choose to lie just out of reach for petting, this means that they feel safe and trust that you will protect them, or that they will protect you if danger appears.

How To Make Your Cat Love You

There are a few steps you can take to strengthen the bond with your cat.

1. Play Every Day

Schedule daily play with ribbon wand toys, laser pointers, fetch, pet-safe bubbles, or your cat’s preferred toy. Your cat will associate you with fun, predictable experiences, and this will strengthen your bond.

2. Teach Your Cat Tricks

Mental enrichment is also important to reduce stress and keep your cat content, especially if they are indoor-only. Try spending 15 minutes per day teaching your cat tricks or commands with a clicker, rewarding them with treats.

This is a great way for food-motivated kitties to bond with their pet parents, but know that learning tricks may not appeal to all cats.

3. Let Your Cat Be Close to You

Allow your cat to be the guide for how much physical affection and social interaction they want from you. Many cats will tolerate cuddling with their humans, but that does not mean they necessarily enjoy it.

References

Humphrey T, Proops L, Forman J, Spooner R, McComb K. The role of cat eye narrowing movements in cat–human communication. Scientific Reports. 2020.

References


Katie Grzyb, DVM

WRITTEN BY

Katie Grzyb, DVM

Veterinarian

Dr. Katie Grzyb received her Doctorate of Veterinary Medicine from Ross University in 2009. She continued her clinical training at...


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