To add to Connie's comment - how about the client who calls on a Saturday - doesn't even matter when, as we're always jammed and this person knows that - and just demands "I need to bring Max in right now!" Which Max - we've only got about 50 - what's wrong? - who are you, for cryin' out loud? Yes, some clients are recognizable by voice, but come, on, a little info - and a dash of politeness would be so nice!

I never stress too much about the pee and poop. I just pick it up and set the client at ease about it. Some pets just can' control themselves with all the smells. The reception staff, however, shouldn't bear the brunt of this. After all, you're the only ones who didn't sign up for doo-doo detail. And I'd rather you kept your hands clean at the keyboards, anyway. ;-)

Oh, I am sure there are careless individuals too. Just felt need to remind of some legitimate reasons. If my dogs make a mess, in the reception area, I ask for papertowels, often a call to "cleanup" is made. If in the exam room waiting, I help myself to the paper towels & discard.

I suspect I will face this more often, with 3 elderly and nervous pets....They all start off terrific, but a few years of blood draws, etc. makes for strong impressions!

Barbara, Absolutely true. However a few I have in mind have admitted to not taking care of their pet's business before entering. These are not elderly dogs either. Just repeat offenders. What is the policy at your place? Do the receptionists clean it or someone else? We receptionists get stuck with the dirty work.

Kelly, Surely you know that some dogs/cats are so nervous going to the vets, that they can't help but eliminate. And then there are the elderly, that if they wait for more than 15 minutes are sure to go, despite eliminating before going through the front door!

And then possibly the "markers" that can't resist going on top of a previous accident. I've had all 3 types.

How about the client who brings her dog with a full bladder/bowel EVERYTIME she visits. "Oh look, Jack's pooping on the rug." AGAIN!

What I hate are the clients whose dogs 'don't need to be on leash, they always obey' - as the dog makes a dash after our clinic cats. They are promptly put on leash, whether the client likes it or not!

We also have a clinic policy that cats must be in carriers or leashed. But it isn't enforced, so we get a lot of cats in arms that do a lot of scratching when the aformentioned dog takes off!

You mean you've never had the call 15 minutes before you close on a Saturday that the clinent's dog hasn't been eating all week and has to be seen NOW!! and aren't you evil for not saying immediately "Come on down!"

That one used to drive me insane.

You know, I always worry that posts like this (where it becomes obvious that vets and vet staff are suckers for a box full of kittens) will only increase our pain. After all, it's a great idea to dump your kittens in a box at a clinic. In my experience, 50% of the time the kittens will remain at the hospital (100% in my place's case) and get adopted out through our personal efforts. I have worked at some places where the owner of the hospital refuses and every box gets taken to the shelter, but I don't think I'd like working there half as much as in places where the staff is allowed to make s personal difference to the lives of kittens like this.

Ah yes, the kittens at the back door...earlier this summer we arrived at work to find a raggedy cardboard box with a lone little kitten inside. We took it in, gave it all the necessities, and put it up for adoption that day...the next morning, there was another cardboard box at the back door, with, you guessed it, another kitten. So we took that one in. Rinse and repeat for the next three days...by the fifth kitten, we were suspecting that a) we were the new local shelter, or b) someone was dumping a whole litter of kittens one by one. The next day, we found a big plastic carrier containing what we assumed were Mom & Dad - who were both promptly spayed and neutered.

Posey: The mama kitty is still with us. We kept her and allowed her to have her kittens with us. This week I'll spay her and the kittens (now 14 days old) will be fostered by one of our techs. All tabby and white. Want one?

OMG LITTLE ORANGE KITTY *melts at the adorableness*

I'm weak in the face of kittens. This is why I don't foster them. I would be a Crazy Cat Lady in like, two weeks.

#3 used to haunt me the most. Still does, even though I'm not a tech anymore I still see evidence of this. Every now and then I encounter someone who is in denial about the severity of their pet's pain. Sometimes the pain may actually be kind of minor, but the dog is a working/performance dog and it's enough to affect his performance. And for some reason, some owners in that situation find it easier to assume that the dog has suddenly become disobedient, rather than face the much more logical conclusion that he hurts.
And other times the pain is more severe, but because the dog will still eat and isn't screaming, the owner assumes it isn't "too bad". It's so frustrating, and so heartbreaking.

What happened to the poor, pregnant kitty in item #2? Please say she wasn't euthanized!

ashleigh: At least a shoe string is a leash of sorts! My favorites are the people who carry Fifi in on a leash, take off the leash, set her on the floor, and allow her to roam free and unattended wherever she may.

Of course it is #3 that strikes right to my heart: cruel and unusual treatment

I've had both a loved Scottie and a human with primary lung cancer, and the labored breathing at the end is horrible and sad. But this happens with all death, regardless of origin, doesn't it? As in the human's, oxygen therapy was advised as useless and of no comfort. But medication was necessary for hospice relief.

How about cruel & unusual punishment of euthanasia for peritonitis, withheld from the veterinary medical professional, sadder and far worse in my opinion.

I have addendum to the late new client!!

1. Arrive 2 hours late

2. On a day before a holiday weekend when you vet is scheduled to fly out for a long weekend

3. Bring not only the 2 kittens you scheduled, but the sick mom and 2 more kittens you failed to mention existed.

4. Insist you are a wildlife rehabilitator and play a serious game of "I know more than you do." with a side dish of "Oh, rabies is no big deal" Mention that this is at least the second litter you've dealt with on the momma cat because you failed to have her spayed LAST time.

5. Refuse an estimate for the recommended services 4 times. Emphatically state money is no object.

To this person's credit they only blinked and asked "What was the total?" once, followed by "um, how much were the exams?" after we got done deworming, retroviral testing, bloodwork, vaccines and everything else we did. and they showed up for the recheck, but they made sure to schedule it with someone other than me.

Sadly, the entire list isn't Miami exclusive. I recognized every single one of them and I live 3000 miles away. Hence, "deranged" clients as one commenter called them, are *everywhere* and prolific to boot. ;-)

What about the clients that bring their dogs in on "shoe-string leashes" or other poorly constructed leads. Surely that should make it on the list somewhere.

Cindy: I've got one kitten right here with your name on it.

You have some seriously deranged clients. However, I am glad you share these stories, cause at least I can say, "I may be a nervous nellie pet Mom, but I've not done any of those things!"

On a semi-related note, how is it that it seems that I am ALWAYS reading about someone finding kittens, their dog finding kittens, kittens finding them - and yet it never happens to me. And I think I'm finally ready for kittens again!